I have not blogged in some time now and I know I have lost all of my followers but for now that is ok because that is what my life seems to be about. Picking up and starting over. I have lost everything I/we have worked our whole life for and now its time to pick up the pieces and start over. I am not sure how I will do it, but I trust that I can push myself to at least get out of bed and do something.
We have gone from going out camping with friends, riding our quads every weekend and going places to losing our home and selling everything just to exist. Now I/we are living with my brother and my husband works out of town and comes home on the weekends. But I have to remember that there are many out there that are worse off than us and try and learn to move on and leave the anger behind because that is not helping. I know I am angry because not only have we lost everything, we are both sick. I have gone from working a full time job to being on disability and house ridden most of the time because of my illness. Lucky my husband; although not feeling well himself can still work and that my brother has been kind enough to take us in.
I think the worst is just knowing that we have worked our whole life to end up with nothing, but I try and remind myself that it must be for a reason; whatever that may be. I miss the days of working and having a life, going out with friends and doing the things a normal person does. Now most of my time is spent around the house with my kitties; which I am so thankful for because as odd as it may sound they keep me going at times. My brother has two cats also, so it has been an adjustment for all of us. My older sister is living with us also for now, but planning on moving out although I do not believe she can afford to live on her own, she has chosen to do this.
I so believe life is all about the choices we make and I feel like I got lost along the way and hope to be able to pick up the pieces and get back to some kind of life. Nothing ever stays the same so I know it wont be my old life, but something new.
I took out my art supplies for the first time yesterday, so I am hoping to go through them and start doing a little art if I can. That has always made me feel better. I remember when I first started drawing and painting that I would get up in the middle of the night because I was by myself and just do something in my art room because it made me so happy to create. Now I can't even get out of bed most days, so we will see how it goes. I am going to try and blog and journal at least a few days a week and maybe even make a YT video if I can get a camera setup. I really want to get back to creating and enjoying life again.
For now I am going to try and at least get out and walk around the block again and maybe open up one of my art boxes today. We will see.
Spike & Sissy |
Until the next time.................
Love, Light & Happiness......
CindyLew
So sorry for all you have been through. I pray that the new year brings you comfort and joy. Creating is hard to do when you feel bad but just staring will really help. You are so talented. Don;t give that up. Maybe you can eventually sell what you do. Hang in there!
ReplyDeletethank you for replying to my post. when i posted this morning i really had no idea anyone would even read it, i was just kind of using it as a journal type thing but i have not used this in a while so maybe it works different now. that is what my sister says also, so who knows, but i trust i can get up and do it again tomorrow. thanks again, cindylew
DeleteI am so sorry to hear of your troubles. May things start looking up SOON!
ReplyDeletethank you, cindylew
DeleteHi Cindy I'm so sorry to hear about all you heartaches and troubles I haven't forgotten you and I'm here when you just want to chat.
ReplyDeleteLife has gotten very hard for many, I pray everything wil improve soon.
Keep in touch, prayers and love sent your way.
Marilou xoxo
thank you for replying and thinking of me. when i posted this morning i really had no idea anyone would even read it, i was just kind of using it as a journal type thing but i have not used this in a while so maybe it works different now. i have watched you grow over the past year or so, but just have not posted but nice to know that you are doing so well; i am so happy for you. i trust i can get up and do it again tomorrow. thanks again, cindylew
DeleteOh sweet Cindy, you are so precious!!!! I'm so very glad you're back to blogging...but so sorry about all that has transpired this past year. It was an awful year for us as well and I'm praying that this new year is going to be a wonderful one!!! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers for physical healing and for pure goodness to happen to you and your family ~ sending you hugs and love dear friend, Dawn
ReplyDeletethank you so much for the post and the thoughts. when i posted this morning i really had no idea anyone would even read it, i was just kind of using it as a journal type thing but i have not used this in a while so maybe it works different now. i know its been hard on so many so i try to keep that in mind but most days its just not enough to lift my spirits but yet we keep going. i will keep you in my thoughts also and trust that we all have a much better year. thanks again, cindylew
DeleteNice to see you back blogging. I was sorry to hear of the hard times you have been experiencing. You are a very talented lady so I hope your health will allow you to start being creative again.
ReplyDelete